Once again, time limits prevail and this will be a brief entry, just to let ya'all know I am still kicking it. My mood has not made as much of an improvement as I would have thought with the extra sleep I have been getting. And sleep is also, beginning to slip once again. The night nurse gave me three PRNs throughout the night last night, and my sleep was scatty at best. Obviously being the weekend, you get stuck in a kind of limbo as no major decisions are made until the week begins. We currently have three patients with Bipolar, all at the height of manic episodes, which is making the ward....very overstimulated, at best!
I remain a voluntary patient, so I have slipped across the road to the shopping centre to buy clothes. (My sister is away for the weekend and I just cannot stomach using the public washer machines at the hospital). I decided to sit here in a cafe and have a quiet moment to myself and type a little missve to you guys away from prying eyes. Still, its nerve wracking, I approach the main road between the hospital and here with trepidation, as my thoughts are filled with images of throwing myself in front of oncoming traffic, just to get off this roller coaster.
My private psych has realised how little I am giving away to the staff at the hospital about my current state of mind, and I think she feels its in my best interest to stay. I believe the PsychDoc at the hospital thinks I will be fine to go home tomorrow... and me... well I just really don't care that much. Anyways, she will be calling him for a talk before ward rounds tomorrow, and we will know the outcome then. If I am discharged from the public hospital, the push will probably be to go into a private one for a period of time.
Hope all is well out there in the blogger-sphere
XOphelia
Sunday, January 24, 2010
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